There was a rich merchant who had 4 wives. He loved the 4th wife the most and adorned her with rich robes and treated her to delicacies. He took great care of her and gave her nothing but the best.
He also loved the 3rd wife very much. He's very proud of her and always wanted to show off her to his friends. However, the merchant is always in great fear that she might run away with some other men.
He too, loved his 2nd wife. She is a very considerate person, always patient and in fact is the merchant's confidante. Whenever the merchant faced some problems, he always turned to his 2nd wife and she would always help him out and tide him through difficult times.
Now, the merchant's 1st wife is a very loyal partner and has made great contributions in maintaining his wealth and business as well as taking care of the household. However, the merchant did not love the first wife and although she loved him deeply, he hardly took notice of her.
One day, the merchant fell ill. Before long, hOne day, the merchant fell ill. Before long, he knew that he was going to die soon. He thought of his luxurious life and told himself, "Now I have 4 wives with me. But when I die, I'll be alone. How lonely I'll be!"
Thus, he asked the 4th wife, "I loved you most, endowed you with the finest clothing and showered great care over you. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?" "No way!" replied the 4th wife and she walked away without another word.
The answer cut like a sharp knife right into the merchant's heart. The sad merchant then asked the 3rd wife, "I have loved you so much for all my life. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?" "No!" replied the 3rd wife. "Life is so good over here! I'm going to remarry when you die!" The merchant's heart sank and turned cold.He then asked the 2nd wife, "I always turned to you for help and you've always helped me out. Now I need your help again. When I die, will you follow me and keep me company?" "I'm sorry, I can't help you out this time!" replied the 2nd wife. "At the very most, I can only send you to your grave." The answer came like a bolt of thunder and the merchant was devastated.
Then a voice called out : "I'll leave with you. I'll follow you no matter where you go." The merchant looked up and there was his first wife. She was so skinny, almost like she suffered from malnutrition. Greatly grieved, the merchant said, "I should have taken much better care of you while I could have !"Actually, we all have 4 wives in our lives
a. The 4th wife is our body. No matter how much time and effort we lavish in making it look good, it'll leave us when we die.
b. Our 3rd wife ? Our possessions, status and wealth. When we die, they all go to others.
c. The 2nd wife is our family and friends. No matter how close they had been there for us when we're alive, the furthest they can stay by us is up to the grave.
d. The 1st wife is in fact our soul, often neglected in our pursuit of material, wealth and sensual pleasure.
The most destructive habit………………….Worry
The greatest Joy………………………….Giving
The greatest loss…………….Loss of self-respect
The most satisfying work……………Helping others
The ugliest personality trait………….Selfishness
The most endangered species………Dedicated leaders
Our greatest natural resource……………Our youth
The greatest “shot in the arm”……….Encouragement
The greatest problem to overcome……………..Fear
The most effective sleeping pill……..Peace of mind
The most crippling failure disease…………Excuses
The most powerful force in life………………Love
The most dangerous pariah………………A gossiper
The world’s most incredible computer……..The brain
The worst thing to be without………………. Hope
The deadliest weapon…………………..The tongue
The two most power-filled words……………”I Can”
The greatest asset…………………………Faith
The most worthless emotion………………Self-pity
The most beautiful attire………………….SMILE!
The most prized possession…………….Integrity
The most powerful channel of communication…..Prayer
The most contagious spirit……………..Enthusiasm
The most important thing in life………………ALLAH
There was once a man who was an enemy to Islam. He had three famous questions that no person could answer. No Islamic scholar in Baghdad could answer his three questions...thus he made fun of Islam in public. He constantly ridiculed Islam and the Muslims. One day a small boy, who`s age was 10, came along and heard the man yelling and screaming at Muslims in the street.
He was challenging people openly to answer the three questions.
The boy stood quietly and watched. He then decided that he would challenge the man. He walked up and told the man, "I will accept your challenge".
The man laughed at the boy and ridiculed the Muslims even more by saying, "A ten year old boy challenges me. Is this all you people have to offer!"
But the boy patiently reiterated his stance. He would challenge the man, and with Allah`s help and guidance, he would put this to an end. The man finally accepted.
The entire city gathered around a small "hill" where open addresses were usually made. The man climbed to the top, and in a loud voice asked his first question.
"What is your God doing right now?"
The small boy thought for a little while and then told the man to climb down the hill and to allow him to go up in order to address the question.
The man says "What? You want me to come down?"
The boy says, "Yes. I need to reply, right?"
The man made his way down and the small boy, age 10, with his little feet made his way up.
This small child`s reply was "Oh Allah Almighty! You be my witness in front of all these people. You have just willed that a Kafir be brought down to a low level, and that a Muslim be brought to a high level!"
The crowd cheered and screamed "Takbir"...."Allah-hu-akbar!!!"
The man was humiliated, but he boldly asked his Second question... "What existed before your God?"
The small child thought and thought.
Then he asked the man to count backwards. "Count from 10 backwards."
The man counted..."10, 9 ,8 , 7 , 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1,0"
The boy asked, "What comes before 0 ?"
The man: "I don`t know...nothing."
The boy: "Exactly. Nothing was before Allah, for He is eternal and absolute."
The crowd cheered again...."Takbir!"...."Allah-hu-akbar!!!!"
The man, now completely frustrated, asked his final question. "In which direction is your Allah facing?"
The boy thought and thought.
He then asked for a candle. A candle was brought to him. The blessed child handed it to the man and asked him to light it.
The man did so and remarked, "What is this supposed to prove?"
The young boy asked, "In which direction is light from the candle going?"
The man responded, "It is going in all directions."
The boy: "You have answered your own question. Allah`s light (noor) goes in all directions. He is everywhere. There is no where that He cannot be found.
"The crowd cheered again...."Takbir!"...."Allah-hu-akbar!!!"
The man was so impressed and so moved by the boy`s knowledge and spirituality, that he embraced Islam and became a student of the young boy.
So ended the debate.
Who was the young boy?
The young boy was one of our leaders and one of the greatest scholars, Imam Abu Hanifa (May Allah bless him).
Once there was a very handsome, pious, well educated young man, whose parents emphasized for him to get married. they had seen so many marriage proposals, and he had turned them all down. The parents thought it was becoming a little ridiculous or suspected that he may have someone else in mind.
However every time the parents left the girls house, the young man would always say “she’s not the one!”
The young man only wanted a girl who was religious and practicing, however one evening his mother arranged for him, to meet a girl, who was religious, and practicing.
On that evening, the young man, and girl, were left to talk, and ask each other questions. (As one would expect).
The young man, being a gentleman that he was allowed, the lady to ask first.
The young girl asked the young man so many questions, she asked about his life, hiseducation, his friends, his family, his habits, his hobbies, his lifestyle, his enjoyment, his pastime, his experiences, his shoe size..
The young man replied to all of her questions, without tiring, and politely, with a smile the young girl took up nearly all of the time, over an hour, and felt bad, and asked the young man do you have any questions?
The young man said, it’s ok. I only have 3 questions…
The young girl thought, wow, only 3 questions okay, shoot.
The young man’s first question was, who do you love the most in the world, someone whose love nothing would ever overcome?
She said, this is an easy question; my mother, he smiled second question, he asked, you said that you read a lot of qur’an, could you tell me which surahs you know the meaning of?
Hearing this she went red and embarrassed and said, I do not know the meaning of any yet, but I am hoping to soon Insha’allah I’ve just been a bit busy. The third question the young man asked, was I have been approached for my hand in marriage, by girls that are a lot more prettier than you, why should I marry you?
Hearing this, the young girl was outraged, she stormed off to her parents with fury, and said I do not want to marry this man he is insulting my beauty, and intelligence. And the young man and his parents were once again, left without an agreement of marriage.
This time, the young man’s parents were really angry, and said what did you do to anger that girl, the family were so nice, and pleasant, and they were religious like you wanted. What did you ask the girl?? Tell us!
The young man said, firstly I asked her, and who do you love the most? She said, her mother,
The parents said so, what is wrong with that??
The young man said, “no one, is Muslim, until he loves Allah, and his messenger (saw) more than anyone else in the world”
If a woman loves Allah and the Prophet (SAW) more than anyone, she will love me and respect me, and stay faithful to me, because of that love, and fear for Allah (SWT) and we can share this love, because this love is greater than lust for beauty.
The young man said, then I asked, you read a lot of Qur’an, can you tell me the meaning of any Surah?
And she said no, because I haven’t had time yet. so I thought of that hadith “ALL humans, are dead except for those who have knowledge” She has lived 20 years and not foundANY time, to seek knowledge, why would I marry a woman, who does not know her rights, and responsibilities, and what will she teach my children, except how to be negligent, because the woman IS the madrasa (school) and the best of teachers. And a woman who has no time for Allah, will not have time for her husband.
The third question I asked her was, that a lot of girls, more prettier than her, had approached me for marriage, why should I choose you?
That is why she stormed off, getting angry. The young man’s parents said that is a horrible thing to say, whywould you do such a thing, we are going back there to apologise. The young man said I said this on purpose, to test whether she could control her anger.
The Prophet (saw) said “do not get angry, do not get angry, do not get angry” when asked how to become pious; because anger is from Satan.
If a woman cannot control her anger with a stranger she has just met,do you think she will be able to control it with her husband??
So, the moral of this story is, a marriage is based on:
One should look for a person who :
And it goes both ways, so women seeking a man, should look for the same things.
Insha’allah, may Allah make every marriage a success, and let us create Love for Allah and his Messenger(SAW) so that Allah can bless us, and create love in our lives.
There is no better structure founded in Islam other than marriage. – The Prophet of Islam (SAW)